We are living one of the maddest times of our lives. I do speak, of course, as a millennial. My grandparents witnessed the war and lived in a dictatorship. I, however, only saw the 9/11 from afar and somehow survived the economical crisis in Portugal between 2010 and 2014. While my grandparents don’t fully understand the technical and medical aspects of COVID-19, they have been patient and they haven’t panicked yet. It’s like they know there is nothing we can do, except wait and follow legal instructions (e.g. stay at home).
I don’t have the same patience they do, but I have been working on that for a couple of years now. Life’s circumstances keep telling me ‘Vanessa, hold your horses, you need to slow down’ to which I, more often than not, respond with impulsiveness and rebellion. This morning I realised I have been fighting against my own destiny and personal processes by refusing to be still and deal with whatever comes my way.
I have tried to escape countless times from what I ought to do so that I don’t deal with what I need to embrace and work in this lifetime. I have been stubborn. I have refused to grow up in the direction of the best version of myself, even though I keep studying and teaching personal development. Maybe I’m being mean to myself here. I have improved in some aspects of my life. I am completing six-months of bodybuilding this week and I have been more aware of my energy.
So maybe I’m slowly learning to master two different skills: on one hand, I’m learning to be more patient and to adjust my emotions by accepting what is; on another hand, I’m learning to cut myself some slack by identifying and acknowledging what I have improved so far. Combining the two, the overall lesson is to be one with mindfulness, the capacity to remain in the present moment, aware of what is going on and yet experiencing calm abiding.
In order to complete or master this lesson to some extent, we need to train our mind. For instances, I have trained and developed my body, but my mind remains scattered. I do understand now I must train this aspect as much as I have been training and conditioning my body. Otherwise I won’t be able to achieve my goals and manifest my life’s vision. That part of the puzzle has been missing and I think it is about time to take mind training more seriously now. According to buddhist scriptures, there are at least six conditions we must meet beforehand, if we want to train the mind. I will eventually talk about them in a future post.