Everyday I try to take another step. Sometimes I do not know what I’m doing or whether I’m following the right order of doing things, but I keep going anyway because that is what I’m guided to do. My inner compass is not the most disciplined or polished, but that’s what I have to work with. Whenever I tried to change myself and follow someone else’s steps it never really worked out well, so I have been waking up and I have told myself “Ok, what are we going to do today to move further?“.
Most of these days I have been moved to get my hands dirty which means that I have spent time creating the products that will be part of The Wellbeing Factory brand. Basically I have been manufacturing different products that I conceived to enhance wellbeing in our everyday life and since that is totally different from sitting in front of a computer typing and analysing data, I have been the happiest kid on the block. It’s a kind of work that engages both the mind and the body, but definitely more the body than the mind.
I enjoy the whole process but I also notice how critical I am regarding my undisciplined self. I keep judging and labelling myself as “slow” and “messy”. I wasn’t aware of this kind of negative self-talk and I find it interesting. Maybe you also have some of that negative self-talk. Oh, I’m so stupid. Oh, I’m so dumb. Oh, why can’t I do things right. We can be so mean to ourselves. And if we let that chat continue on and on, we easily put ourselves in a position where it is rather easy to believe that whatever we do is worthless or not good enough.
As I push myself to go further on this journey, I’m also working on giving myself a tap on the back and on becoming more benevolent towards myself. I have been trying to focus and cherish my ability to come up with new ideas and ways to incorporate alternative healing methods instead of beating myself up for not being yet in the stage I would like to be. The hard fact is that I’m only one person and a business has a lot of different aspects that need to be taken care of. If I’m busy manufacturing, I can’t be at the same time looking after marketing or taking care of admin details. If I’m working my way through products, I can’t be working on my services. Embracing this process with mindfulness has made me more patient with myself and my progress.