I don’t check my wordpress dashboard and notifications as much as I used to. I have been ‘away’ from the blogging world to some extent. I feel a bit nostalgic about it sometimes. I do miss that writing rush and the communication between bloggers. It used to be fun and even therapeutical.
Now that we are socially isolated from each other throughout the entire world, I have felt the need to write down my thoughts in a blog post format and I have also read people’s feedback. This morning I had an interesting comment from someone I don’t really know.
Thanks to my empath nature, I can feel what people feel through what they write. It was a heavily charged comment. It was in fact full of meanness, because it was clearly meant to hurt someone’s feelings and self-esteem.
What made me sad wasn’t even the fact that someone out there wanted to stick a finger in one of my unhealed wounds. What made me sad was to realise that there are still many people out there lacking kindness and self-love, which in turn leads them to inflict hurt on others so that they can feel better about themselves.
The passive-aggressive comment was so misinformed that the person even thought I was the model from the post’s picture. Although it would be nice to have 20 years old again, I was nowhere to be found on that picture. The author of that comment only wanted a free pass to let their toxicity come out.
Then I saw myself with three options. I could accept the comment and leave no reply, which is not much like me. I could accept the comment and feed the toxic situation. Or I could simply delete the comment, because there wasn’t even an ounce of public service in it. In the past, I always chose the second option. This time, I chose the last one.
To choose the third option was choosing kindness for me. Not kindness towards the other person, but for myself. If I had chosen to go with my usual option, I would be ruminating and rethinking my reply, even long after pressing the ‘send’ button. The discussion would go on and with it the adrenality of flight or fight responses.
So I have one thing to tell you. I’m done with people who don’t know how to communicate in a gentle way. This is my space. This is my blog, and I won’t allow people with bad energy and mean intentions to have a voice here.
This is a place for kindness. Gentleness. If you don’t agree with my opinions, that’s perfectly fine. You are welcome to present your point of view with kindness and humanity. You are not allowed, however, to come here and pollute my space. You are not allowed to humiliate me or any of my readers in public.
We are living times of madness. We are all vulnerable and we also have too much time on our hands now to read and comment blogs. Let’s just make sure we keep being kind and cordial to each other, because that’s what we need to base our future on.
I would like to finish this post with a lesson I have passed on to my students:
When you don’t have anything positive to say to lift others, stay quiet.