I feel a lot, but I can rarely identify why I’m feeling what I’m feeling without reasoning about it first. I might know I’m sad, but I’m not entirely sure why. I might start crying and yet not know immediately the underlying reason of why I’m crying in that moment. That’s why I like blogging so much, it helps me figure out the root cause of my feelings, and when you have that you have more power over your wellbeing.
I have also been meditating for two days in a row now. I took a friend’s advice to get back to it as soon as possible so that I could figure out what was happening with me and my life. In fact, my friend gave me the following four commandments:
- Get out from where I was as fast as I could
- Take care of myself (meditation, energy cleanse)
- Focus on my stuff (thesis, books)
- Think about what happened and why
I’m terrible at following instructions, but I’ve been following her list up to number 2 and I accidently end up doing number 4 while I meditate and clear my energy, despite her strong advice to only do it once I complete the other three. I would love to do as she told me, but information just pops in and I can’t help but try to understand it. Either way, I can tell that meditation has brought positive changes and clouds seem to be clearing up.
While yesterday I managed to sleep, today I saw that my lower chakras were deviated to the left and that my heart chakra was pushed to the right though. This was during my yoga session in the morning and I spent the rest of the day emotionally down but nothing that seemed out of the ordinary giving my circumstances. I felt a sort of painful vortex in my heart chakra in the evening nonetheless, which was only gone after a good cry. I take that the painful energy needed to be released.
I know I’m starting a new cycle of healing and I chose both yoga and meditation to help me through it. It’s a cycle of emotional healing, after a good couple of months working on my root chakra and physical body. The sacral chakra is linked to our basic emotions, relationships and addictions. These are definitely aspects I need to look at. It also regulates the pelvic area, sex organs, potency, fluid function, kidneys (which have been hurting a lot in the last couple of days) and bladder, all aspects that haven’t been working properly.
I’m no longer using food to numb my emotional pain, so that’s a good starting point already and I believe that the work I have done to strengthen my root chakra and ground my physical body has played a role on it. I don’t know how much time I will need to focus on my sacral chakra but I will trust the process as I have done so far. Sitting down to face my feelings won’t be as easy as lifting weights, but with time and the same amount of dedication I put into bodybuilding I will also ace it.