How to Create Your Life Vision

Your Life Vision is the reason why you should be waking up everyday eager to build and work towards what matters most to you in life. My sincere take on depression and other “mental illnesses” is pretty much based on the idea that people need a “Why”, they need dreams to follow, a meaning and a sense of purpose in order to live mentally healthy. In a society where dreams are seen as foolish fantasies, and living your purpose as a total act of irresponsibility, no wonder that 400 to 500 million people throughout the world are currently diagnosed with some sort of mental health problem. So I thought today I should share with you my personal and professional notes on how to create a life vision for yourself.

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Grit Is What It Takes To Make Dreams Come True

I have been listening to a lot of episodes from The Life Coach School Podcast, created by Brooke Castillo and which talks about entrepreneurship, coaching, and Positive Psychology. There was one particular episode that really hit my brain and heart. It was an episode about grit, our ability to persevere and work towards a specific goal while also keeping our passion alive.

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My Heart Is Reserved, Not Guarded

I told you from the very beginning that we could only be friends.

You said you understood it and you wouldn’t ask for anything more. You not only tricked yourself with that thought as you also tricked me to buy into it. All I wanted was a friend, because that was all I could be. I learned that relationships are already hard enough when life is more or less steady… and if it isn’t steady, if your mind and heart are not in a good place, then it’s not a good idea to have a relationship, because it won’t be a healthy one.

This time I was very conscious of my past mistakes and I did my best to let you know what my heart was like right now. It’s not dark anymore, but there’s a big hole on it. I told you I had to fix it by myself but you were stubborn; you thought you could fix it. No one can fix another’s heart. A broken heart can only be fixed from within and you wanted to fix it from outside.

I let you in. A little bit more each time we talked. I refused your movements, and even your attempts to kiss me. You said I was pushing you away, and maybe I was. Not because I was scared, but because I knew you were not the one, and we could only be friends. What happened next I take it as my fault. After one year being by myself, the desire of being embraced took over.

I thought maybe I could give it a try, and that maybe my refusal was a simple defence mechanism from my side. But no. It was my intuition screaming loudly, saying you were not the one, and as much as I rationally wanted to make it work, the truth is that you are not the one… and I don’t want to be with anyone else but the one. I know, you told me it, when I shared my past relationships and situationships. I overdid it in matters of the heart. I kissed too many frogs with the hope they would become handsome princes, and they only became ghosts in my head who come to haunt me every now and then.

I believe, however, that the reason why I can’t be with you or feel what I rationally should feel is not due to the fact I overdid it in the past. Yes, my heart is not healed yet, but it’s not guarded either. I don’t know if hearts ever heal, to be honest, and that’s ok. I do know we can only be friends, even though you are that damn warrior, the kind of man that protects and takes care of his woman. You made me realise that I want that too, but I also saw that I’m now a warrior too – I want to fight my own battles as well and, although I want to be treated like a princess, I also want to feel I have my own space when I need it.

Life feels weird sometimes. I felt from the very first time you were not the one, because my heart is reserved. If we had met another time, we would had been the perfect match. I love you… I just don’t love you in the way a woman loves her man and life is too short to fool ourselves.